Carnival Meme

[21stcenturyguy]

Step right up, folks! It’s a non-terrible AU Crystallis carnival! No Calamity, no Palitutu, no dead or crystalized friends. Just some good, old-fashioned carney fun.

• 1. Food: We all know why we’re here, and it’s deep friend and on a stick. Sample the local delicacies, like kupo nut funnel cake, deep fried Touch Me-nuggets, chocobo egg custard, and Marlboro tentacles on a stick (warning: may cause Poison).
• 2. Games: They’re rigged, and the prizes are cheaply made, but it’s a point of honor. Only the best and most skilled Heroes can win the prized Fat Chocobo Plushie!
• 3. Rides: Aqures Ixen doesn’t have much by way of roller coasters, but there are chocobos with brightly dyed feathers and even a modified magitek unit for kids to ride on. Maybe some Heroes will lend their various mounts?
• 4. Contests: There will be dance-offs, bake-offs, eat-offs, craft-offs. Whatever your Hero knows how to do, do it best and you may go home with a blue ribbon!
• 5. Music and Dancing: There’s a small dance floor set up, and some locals are playing their instruments and singing. Anyone who wants to can join in to dance or play. There’s been enough drinking and merriment at the carnival so far that nobody will care if you suck or not.
• 6. Charity Events: We have to think of those poor Hypello families whose boats have been commandeered by the Heroes of Light. Help raise money to get them back on their sea-legs by volunteering at the Kissing Booth, Pie Throwing Stand, the Dunk Tank, Face Painting Stand, or other such carnival staples. Won’t you pleash helpibble the Hypellosh?
• 7. Fortune Telling: Come have your fortune told by the great yet tiny tarutaru mystic, Madame Fortururu! (Accuracy of the fortune is NOT GUARANTEED)
• 8. Tunnel of Love: Yeah, there’s not actually a stream flowing through the middle of the city…but in AU-qures Ixen, there totally is. Float along in a scuffed-up old swan boat with that special guy or gal, and think to yourself, what a wonderful world.
• 9. Other Assorted Merriment: Make up your own carnival prompt.

Comments

[damn_juicebox]

I'll take sixty.

[Without hesitation, Rukia plunks down a small bag of gil before turning to smile at Santa with saccharine sweetness. Well hello, fancy meeting you here! She gets to support a good cause and peg her ally in the face multiple times with pies? This might be one of the highlights of her past month!]

I'm surprised. What made you decide to take this job in particular?

[EAT PIE.]

[21stcenturyguy]

[Santa raises an eyebrow at Rukia. So enthusiastic. She must really feel for the hypello plight.]

You sure you can handle that many? Your little arms might get tired.

[His lips spread into a smirk.] What makes you think I'm not a nice guy who cares about charity? [His tone is all sarcasm, but really, it's an honest question. Punks are allowed to help people out to when they wanna.]

Put your money in the donation box. You can start with what's on the table there, but you're gonna have to wait for them to make more pies if you want that many.

[He can't wait for her to throw the first one and miss. It's going to be incredible.]

[damn_juicebox]

Don't sound so hopeful. I assure you, my aim is quite good.

[Thanks to slinging all those kidou spells at targets in the shinigami academy. Granted, this is a little different, but she's pumping herself up with confidence. As long as she hits him once, she'll be satisfied. But she expects to get her money's worth. The money goes into the box and she approaches the table, hefting up one of the pies. A child toddles past, and Rukia calls out to him.]

Oi! Want to help me throw pies? He'll have a harder time dodging if there are two coming at once.

[She might as well have told him that Christmas is coming early this year, the way his face lights up.]

'Yeah!'

[The youngster picks up a pie, and Rukia fixes Santa with a fierce little smile. Then they both pitch their pies on the count of three.]

[21stcenturyguy]

[Thanks to the trick of the booth, Santa's actually further back than he appears. The illusion won't work against an opponent for more than one round, but it gets him through the first round mostly intact.]

[Well, actually, the pies land at his feet, splattering his shoes with whipped cream. It's actually more painful to Santa than a pie to the face would've been. But whatever. He'll tough it out. At least he thought to wear an old pair to the carnival.]

Welp, kiddos, looks like you're gonna have to try harder than that. [He is fully aware that his taunts are gonna get him SO MANY PIES in the face, but if you can't taunt a person throwing pies at you, what kind of life are you living?]

[damn_juicebox]

Then that's what we'll have to do.

[She nods firmly to her child accomplice who returns the gesture, and they both reel back before pitching another pair of pies. If they miss again, she'll just have to rope more kids into this. Her arm would get tired after throwing sixty pies, after all.]